口上翻訳をrec.jugglingに投稿

明後日で最後の出社日となるドイツ人インターンに最終日のfarewell party
後に傘回しを見せる約束をした。さあ、これから口上考えるぞ、
ということで和英辞典を駆使して(^^;)掛詞なども考慮したベーシックな案を考えた。
どれくらい英語として通じるのか見当もつかないので
はじめてrec.juggling に投稿してみた。さてどのような反応が返ってくるかなあ。
投稿記事はこんなかんじ。

Hi all.

This is my first time post in rec.juggling.
I am a Japanese amateur juggler.
I am learning Kasa-no-kyoku.
Kasa-no-kyoku is one of the Dikagura performances.
Tea cup, metal ring, ball, square wooden measuring cup and various other objects are spun around on the top of an umbrella.
http://www.edo-daikagura.com/english/perform.htm

Ordinarily, Daikagura is performed by two persons, an actor and a
speaker. The speaker describes the performance by monolog (sometimes dialog)
The monolog includes many puns ("Kakekotoba" in Japanese) and
analogies("Mitate" in Japanese).
I want to translate the monolog of Kasa-no-kyoku into English, but
literal translations cannot express puns and analogies.
I try to make a free translation.
First I write a literal translation in order to display the performance.
Next I write my free translation. Please correct my translation.

The original purpose of Daikagura was to serve as a talisman for the people, chasing away evil on behalf of the gods of the shrines.
So, actions of Daikagura often relate prayer for Gods.

Juggling items:
Mari: a ball
Masu: a Japanese wooden square measuring cup
Masu is used for measuring rices and drinking Japanese Sake.
Kanawa: a metallic ring
Kana = metallic, Wa = ring.
Kane means metal. Kane also means money.

Original Japanese:
Mazu kono kasano uede mari wo mawasimasu.
Minasama no gokateiga marino youni maruku osamarukotowo
inotte marino mawashiwake.

Tugini Masu wo mawasimasu.
Minasamaga masumasu hanjou itasimasuyouni masuno mawashiwake.

Saigoni Kanawa wo mawasimasu.
Minasama no kanemawariga yokunarimasuyouni kanawano mawashiwake

Literal Translation:
At first, I will juggle Mari on this umbrella.
May your family be happy like the ball.

Next, I will juggle Masu on the umbrella.
May you prosper much more.

Finally, I will juggle this metallic ring on the umbrella.
May you be rich.

Free Translation
At first, I will juggle this ball on this umbrella.
May your family be rounded like the ball.

Next, I will juggle this wooden measuring cup on the umbrella.
May you prosper in a great measure.

Finally, I will roll this metallic ring on the umbrella.
In Japanese, metal means money.
So, may you be roling in money.

I would greatly appreciate your comment!
Thanks in advance

Hiroyasu Kurose